Hi, I’m Sheri McGregor, author of the book Done With The Crying: Help and Healing for Mothers of Estranged Adult Children. There is also an accompanying Workbook, and another book for parents of estranged adult children (forthcoming–see the cover photo below). I also run the site for parents of estranged adult children Rejected Parents.net. Some of my publishing credits are summarized below. You can get a more complete listing, with some links on my publishing credits page.
My nonfiction includes books and articles. Here are the latest:
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Topics include nature, the outdoors, business, psychology, health, and home topics – – as well as other interesting opportunities that come my way. You can find out about my three popular hiking guides here.
I’ve researched and written hundreds of articles, which have appeared in national and international publications including Reader’s Digest Publications, InfoWeek, The Washington Post, Salon.com, San Jose Magazine, Oracle Corporation’s Profit Magazine, the San Diego Union Tribune, Restaurant Management, Pizza Today Magazine, Chickens Magazine, and a host of other magazines and websites. I’ve also contributed to the supplemental middle grade textbook, Teens & Sex, with an article I researched on teen pregnancy.
My personal essays have appeared in popular anthologies including Adams Media’s Cup of Comfort for Mothers & Daughters, Simon & Schuster’s Chocolate for a Woman’s Soul (vol. 2), and the fun book for imperfect moms titled The Kid Turned Out Fine, as well as in publications including Christian Science Monitor, Select Magazine, Raven Chronicles, and a variety of parenting publications.
Other nonfiction includes contributions to the San Diego Natural Guide, assisting with companies’ communication and marketing needs, providing researched brochure content and informative copy for clinicians wishing to educate their clients, and for non-profits including Families for Depression Awareness.
My fiction has included short stories in OzBike, Woman This Month, and The Better Drink. Two romantic fiction books were published by Zebra/Kensington Publishing in 1999 and 2000, and a 2002 novella was released as part of the Romancing the Holidays Vol. 2 anthology by Elan Press.
My education includes earning a Bachelor’s Degree in Psychology in 2007, and a Masters Degree In Human Behavior in 2012. I have served on the Advisory Board for the College of Letters & Sciences at National University. Most recently, I have completed two years of doctoral education in psychology with California Southern University.
I am not taking coaching clients at this time. .
For a more complete listing of my publications, see the list of selected publications.
Dear Sheri, this is Diane, aka TheBluesky. Yes, I was my pretty mushy self on the forum, wanting to let all that were in that space with me, for the time I was there, to know how much I embraced all of their history, however diverse, we WERE MOMS.
As I read through your book (Done With The Crying), forced myself to do the exercises, I turned my soul a few times, but soon I saw, realized, that there was no option, if I were to maintain my physical and emotional health, I had to make a solid commitment to accept the soul journey I was designed to experience.
And that of my so very much loved children.
I saw, felt that with you in your book.
Much love to you and your family.
Always, Hippie Peace and Love,
Diane
Hi Diane,
It’s nice to see you here rather than at the help and healing site–what a nice surprise. Thank you for your wonderful note! I wish you the best of everything, Diane. And if you ever want to talk, you know how to find me. You’re such a kind person. I know you will spread “blue skies” everywhere you go! — Sheri McGregor
Dear Sheri,
This is from Aussiemom/SandyP. Just want you to know that my entry into the Pacific International Quilt Festival being held Oct. 13/16 in Santa Clara, California, titled: ” Wall of Silence” was accepted into the juried exhibit. It will be shipped down into the US and California, where you live but thought you might like to know about this as it is based on the experiences of those parents rejected by their grown children and the estrangement we’ve experienced. From your site some time ago, the subject of the book, The Velveteen Rabbit came up and I used this as an analogy and inspiration for the lower portion of the quilt, with joyful rabbits playing amongst colourful flowers, the top portion of the quilt is heavy in colour, centred on the multiple faceless faces of those children who choose to estrange from parents and how, with a puppet below, they control the lives of parents/grandparents as though on a golden chain over which we, as parents, are helpless to control.
Sincerely, Aussiemom
Dear Sheri, I’ve just finished your book “Done With the Crying”. It was a great source of help and inspiration to me and have recommended it to other moms who are in the same situation. What a shame that this has become an epidemic. We have done our best to parent, love, educate and sacrifice for our children, only for them to reject us. In our situation, the wife and her family have done a great job of isolating our son since he was 12 years old, when we moved into the house next door to those people. He is now 34 and married to the daughter of this family, with 2 beautiful children, whom we cannot see. What a sad, complicated story, but my husband & I continue to pray and have hope. Thank you for writing such a compelling, helpful book. Our hopes and prayers are with you and all others suffering with this pain, and that one day there will be redemption.
Hello Sheri
I was wondering where I could purchase a copy of “Done with Crying” as I cannot get a copy delivered to Australia for legal reasons. Would you know who would sell it in Australia. thanks in advance for your help and guidance.
Dear sheri,
Hi. I have read your book two times!! My shrink asked me to order two copies of it!!
My youngest, is a daughter of 34 yrd. Old. I have another daughter of 37 1/2 yrs. Old and a son of 39. The older two may like me a little. They are part of my life. They were 4 1/2, 3 and seven months when their dad of 36 yrs old died of cancer. I never remarried and raised them on my own. When I needed help the little one chose her beautiful and his family over me. As a result, I was upset with her. She was married about 4 yrs. Ago. I was told a week later by her. She told me I was crazy, mental and very, very disturbed. She wants nothing to do with me. I have tried several times a year to beg for forgiveness and mercy taking blame for it all. I cannot get anywhere and boy have I cried, have self hatred, self guilt and no self esteem at all. I see a shrink. And am a strong christian woman. I attend bible study groups, attend church and pray a lot. Your book has shown me that I am suffering normal reactions.
The estranged children have the power while we do not. They are the judge, jury, defense attorney and the prosecuting attorney. I think they enjoy see us suffering.
Your book is wonderful and a strength of support and a great comfort.
I never realized this is a growing epidemic!!
Thanks for your wonderful book!!
Hello Sheri,
I live in Malaysia and I have searched online for your book and could not find it locally. My family is going through a hard time in more ways than one. We have been facing financial difficulty for a couple years. With the worsening economy in my country, it has been difficult on my parents to fund our education.
My parents had been waiting for my brother’s graduation and prepared to celebrate his return. However, upon returning to Malaysia, my brother packed up and left without a word. Though I cannot say that it has been easy for me, it certainly has been much worse for my parents. They will feel an even greater emptiness when I leave to study overseas in less than a month’s time. I wanted to present your book as a gift to both my parents when I leave as my farewell gift to them to help with their healing.
Is there any way that I can get a copy at a local store within a week without paying a large sum for shipping and taxes? I come from quite a humble family and financially, we’re not in the best state right now. Do let me know if there is a local store in Malaysia that may carry this book. I checked the local Barnes’ and Noble and could not find it. I asked the bookstore if I could order it but they stated it would be at least a week delivery.
Thank you so much. 🙂
Hello Lynn,
I’m sorry your family has undergone such pain! What a kind daughter you are to care for your parents’ happiness. They’re very fortunate to have you. My best suggestion would be to order it from Amazon and have it delivered–you can include a gift note with it. Or you could print a copy of the book and write a note and tell them it would be coming, and present that to them before you go. You could choose the most inexpensive shipping available. I believe there is a service that can help with it, too (Borderlinx … although I don’t know much about it, so can’t endorse). I wish there was a better answer that could help you get the book immediately in Malaysia. Sorry! Please take care, and let me know how it turns out.
Thank you for writing, and again, you are a true blessing to your parents.
Hugs,
Sheri McGregor
Dear Sherry,
I’m so very sorry that you have had to endure the pain of estrangement.
Thank you so much for your kind words about my book, Done With The Crying: Help and Healing for Mothers of Estranged Adult Children. I am so very grateful that it is of help to you … and I’m always happy when people who have sough therapy shar it with their clinician. Thank you again for your kindness.
I wish you the very best!
Sheri McGregor
Oh, Patricia. I’m very sorry for your pain. Although not what I would call “common,” I have heard of other situations where a neighbor family or other family in close proximity has usurped the parents’ natural position. It seems to happen subtly at first, which makes it all that more insidious. Again, I’m really sorry.
🙁
Thank you for your kind words about Done With The Crying. I am so grateful that the book is of help to other parents who know the pain of estrangement from adult children. I apologize for my tardiness in responding, too. Sometimes, the spam comments are overwhelming and it takes time to weed through them all. You mentioned hope, so I will just share my recent article on the subject: http://www.rejectedparents.net/estrangement-what-about-hope/
It may not (or may) be of help to you, but perhaps others who read here will find it helpful.
Thank you for your note, and please take care.
Hugs,
Sheri McGregor
Hi Sheri,
It was interesting to read about your struggle when your son abandoned you- I am going through the same now. It is a difficult phase of our life and my husband and I are coming to terms at the situation. My husband is more composed than me and my peri-menopausal phase is not helping either. I am a very confident person and usually deal with my head but it’s different when it’s someone dear to you like your children. They think it’s emotional drama and so on—–. Reading your article has alerted my brain that this is not end of the world. But as a mother u do feel the pain especially if you have worked so hard all your life moving from one country to other so they get the best in their life. I guess I am writing on this blog to relieve myself but like many others like us I have started looking forward- just started Pilates and my tummy is over grown – so will go for tummy tuck to build my confidence and care for myself a bit more- now that I have more time. I will read ur definetly read ur books. Thanks & xx Rea
Hello I’m Karen from the Great Britain, I have just read a small piece of what you suffered with the estrangement, I felt I had to write to you for sharing your experiences I’m sat in tears reading it, as I too cry everyday, my son and I moved out of our home 4 years ago to escape my husband who after 17 years of marriage (a excellent marriage) he chose to take steroids and turned from a wonderful man into the devil, so cut a long story short we divorced. Me and my son got an apartment and was doing ok he was supportive, but now he is 18 and very nasty towards me, which I put up with, but my finances are terrible and it’s difficult working to pay bills so I have had to send him to live with his dad and new wife and baby, so now he takes everything out of me one minute then nice the next, and rarely visits me or texts me. I offer him to come for tea but ignores the messages. It’s so hurtful, I am going to buy you book “done with the crying”. I think it will help me. Thankyou so much I’m glad I found you.
Sheri, I read the article about the estrangement from your son and it was a great help to me. We have over the past few years become estranged from our lovely son. It brought it home to us and now we know that we weren’t the only ones….
We unfortunately have also by default become estranged from our three grandsons – we believe down to the wife.
My son has accused us of terrible things over the years. My two other children can’t believe it and wonder if he was brought up in another family!
Thanks to you we feel a lot better about ourselves and will read your book. At last someone understands the feelings of failure as a parent.
Thank you
Angela,
I’m always sorry to hear of those who’ve gone through the pain of estrangement. I hope Done With The Crying is helpful to you–you might find some assistant at the website http://www.rejectedparents.net too. There is a support group, and more.
Take care, Angela. Thank you for writing.
Sheri McGregor
Hello Karen,
I hope you will find Done With The Crying of help. You are among such a large crowd of parents suffering in estrangement. You’re not alone. Thank you for writing. If you haven’t yet, you may find the other site helpful, too: http://www.rejectedparents.net
Hugs,
Sheri McGregor
Thank you for writing to me. In the book, there is a chapter that deals with other things that are sort of “time of life,” with menopause being one of them. I hope you will find some of the strategies helpful. A tummy tuck would scare me too much to do! Please do take good care of yourself, and give yourself time and rest to heal if you do that.
You are right…estrangement is not the end of the world!
Take good care.
Sheri McGregor
I like to get my inspiration from really meaningful phrases said by truly great people like “The greater the difficulty, the more glory in surmounting it”, do you know where I can find thematic compiltaions of those?
http://fermapachura.com.pl/?p=2186&lang=pl